Keeping It Going

Seventeen days until we leave for our week's vacation on a Caribbean Cruise. Wow, time is flying. I have never cruised before so I am just a bit apprehensive about it. I'm hoping the weather is great for us. The weight that I put back on over the holidays is a bummer but I have been back on track this past week and hitting the gym so hopefully by the time we leave I'll be back or at least close to the weight I was in November. I start with a personal trainer tomorrow and I'm excited about it and at the same time I am scared! We'll see what happens, but, I am determined to stick to it. Yay!

We changed health insurance at the beginning of the year. It is such a hassle for me as I have Arthritis and see a Dr regularly as well as have a IV therapy every 8 weeks. I am due for my treatment next week so my fingers are crossed that my appointment today with the Rheumatologist goes smoothly and I get an appointment for next week for the treatment. If I can't get in before our cruise then I will have to deal with the extra pain. I'm keeping a positive attitude about this.

I'm glad that I am taking the time to take care of my health and to blog. Yay, an accomplishment! Keeping it going.

Little Miss Lazy Bones

Frustration is what I am feeling this morning. Ugh. For some reason my internet connection is so slow that I'm ready to throw down this Mac! I'm going to get a new wireless router (mine is ancient) and see if that helps. If not, I may be changing my internet carrier. Would love to hear from anyone that has had this problem and how you fixed it.

On the up side I was able (after many x hitting the resend button) to order the package from the Real Estate school so that I can get going on that. I'm having mixed feelings on this adventure now. My daughter is planning on moving much closer and has asked me if I will help out with the kids. I am thrilled that they are going to be closer and that I will have more opportunities to be a part of their lives but at the same time the last thing that I want to do is put myself in a situation where I'm overwhelmed. I will just have to stick to prioritizing - my business should not be first in my life. I do have family that I love and want to be a part of - my Mom, my two daughters, my son (who is going to be a Dad for the first time) and my husband.

To be honest I have a terrible track record of following through. Cough, cough - ahem - this is so embarrassing, and humiliating to actually admit but I also know that anyone who knows me well knows this about me. For whatever reason I have had to not just 'buck up' and get things done I don't know. I think maybe laziness is a learned habit and one I intend to break. But it is hard - after-all I can't say how many people have said how spoiled I am and what a great life I have. True, but, big f*ing deal. The things that I am most proud of in my life have been when I had to work for them. I guess the best way for me to get off the potty is to just get off the potty. Maybe it's that I go to the gym today when I don't want to. Maybe it's back to setting a time limit each day that I can loaf but the rest of the time has to be constructive. I think deep down I am fearful of failure. I have learned from the past that when I face something head on that I am fearful of it diminishes in it's power over me.

Well, I must run now, gotta get my shoes on and head to the gym.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work I go...

The last few months have been a range of the worst I've ever felt and a clarity of mind and spirit. I had a one week 'vacation' at our local behavioral health hospital for a little 'rest'. I was put on medications that I have never taken before and I was not able to leave said hospital until my Dr cleared it. Talk about scary! Luckily I knew it was an opportunity for me to focus just on getting better and dealing with my diseases. I am happy to report that the medications have worked very well for me - beyond my expectations. Who knew that a couple of medications would really help those desperate and anxiety rid moods?

The holidays were wonderful. I did things with a happy and joyous heart and never felt overwhelmed by the Season, only excitement. It has taken me much longer to take down all the decorations but that's OK, who cares?

During this last few months it became really clear (again) that I must find a something to keep me busy, fulfilled and out of my head so I decided to go back to the one job (besides wife and mommy) that fulfilled me and brought out the best in me. I am going to get my Real Estate License again and go back into the business. Some reactions have been negative saying things like 'in this market?, no one is getting financing' and most have been very supportive. I do know what the market has been like. I do know that it will take some time before I make some real $ in the business. I also know that just getting out and meeting people, helping people and just being involved will feel great. I am lucky to have the luxury of taking lots of time to build a business. We don't need any income from me so this is just going to be fun for me with the real possibility of making a nice income to boot.

First on the agenda is to satisfy the education that is required to obtain my license as well as studying to take the state test again. This is what I will be focusing my energy on for the next month - 6 weeks. It is nice to not have to worry about a deadline to do this but at the same time I have goals in place. Once I take and pass the state test and get my license then I will apply for positions with a few Real Estate Companies in the area. I have a few in mind now.

I am going on my first cruise with hubby at the beginning of February for a week in the Caribbean. I can hardly wait. This is a must for us as a couple - the last real vacation we took was in December of 2006 to Cancun and it rained the entire week. It sucked. So this time I am cautiously optimistic about this one. There are many things that need to be done this month and I welcome the distractions. First off I am back on my weight loss/getting fit journey. I lost 27 lbs last year and was very close to my ideal weight until the holidays. Eh, that's ok, life is to be lived and enjoyed. I have to say though it is much more fun to see the scale go down and the jeans in a smaller size look great on me than eating all the extra goodies. It's a lifestyle that I hope to stick to throughout the rest of my life and hopefully will extend my life and quality of life. Also on my list is a commitment to purchase, prepare and deliver a meal for 30 to our local women and children's shelter. These are families displaced by domestic violence. I am really looking forward to that. I am also learning how to get the most out of my new Macbook Pro. Since I have always been a PC girl it is an adjustment but it's all good.

I hope to be more consistent with blogging just for my benefit. It's fun and cathartic to blog. It also gets me to read my friend's blogs' for updates and enjoyment.

I can just feel that 2010 is going to be the best year so far for me! Happy New Year!